Wednesday, March 02, 2005

The Adventures of Contagion Boy...

Finally after 72 hours I'm beginning to feel semi-normal again...Well normal for me.It started Sunday night amidst the Oscars. Now if my cable system included the TV GUIDE channel and I caught sight of Joan and Melissa Rivers doing their red carpet schtick that would explain fully why I was violently ill. But my tv has no Rivers running through it. I barely made it through the Oscars and felt like somebody dropped one of them on my head.

Monday early morning- Left side of my face numb... sinus headache outraegous... energy just not there. I had fever visions of my body with a hat and suitcase waving to me singing "Hello, I must be going". I flopped on the couch for the day half awake half asleep.Diet consists of toast, chicken dumpling soup. *big mistake* Stomach gods not happy.

The fever really kicked in yesterday and I was so out of it I think you neeeded to poke me with a stick to see if I was still alive.I slept the day away. Sinus headaches begins to make it's way through nasal passages to the great march towards my chest.Appetite -zero.

Late last night the star of "Alien"(no not Sigourney Weaver) takes up residence in my chest. Fever breaks slightly but you know that old footage of the skier wiping out during the "Wide World of Sports" 'agony of defeat' moment? Yeah I felt worse than that.

This morning I got up to take a shower. The rabbits look at me like "Where the hell have you been? and We'd like our carrots NOW." Still totally congested - head feels like it weighs roughly 300 pounds.Visons of Ted Kennedy. Check medicine- out of medicine. Go to make toast- out of bread. Check soups-Beef Barley, clam chowder, split pea.- YUCK.

Unfortunatley, Mrs. Pratt is at work and has a class tonight.So I'm on my own.

Eventually I get enough energy to drive to the grocery store. I get my soup, bread and robitussin. The cashier sees the contents of my basket and Veronica Mars the idea that I'm sick. She gives me the stink eye for being contagion boy and handing her money while I'm suppressing a cough. Sorry lady,I had no choice and I left my bubble suit at home. And despite it being March 2nd it's 20 fucking degrees out.

So now I'm alive and heavily medicated and hoping that tomorrow I can return to being a functioning member of society.

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