Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Rubber Band Man...

One of the greatest gifts I have ever received is the rubber band ball. My friend Granola Girl who I worked with for many years until she moved to the wilderness of the midwest started it, passed it on to me,and over the years it has grown steadily but sporadically.


Adding to it daily.

The rubber band ball is now the size of a small grapefruit. It's very bouncy. One day last year I was absent-mindedly bouncing it a few times on my office floor. I forgot that student study carrels were underneath my office. I remember the stressed out student knocking on my office door and me trying to explain ."I..have a rubber band ball..and uh..what? final exams? heh heh...uh..sorry." I slipped it back in my desk drawer and was waiting for the embarrassment to fade.

But lately at the end of the day, before I shut off the computer,turn off the lights andl lock the door, I've been adding a rubber band to the rubber band ball. Kind of symbolically saying- I made it through another day and another layer is added to my life.

My journal is like that.It's the electronic rubber band ball which I add to daily to mark time and keep my sanity.Then there are experiences that will feel as if five or ten or twenty rubber bands have been added. I still feel that way about my time in San Diego.

I'll be a bit candid and admit I don't have many friends locally. I work 9-5 then it's usually home and before you know it the evening hours go by and sleep beckons. It's been a bit rough on me because in younger days I was quite a social animal.I think I was even housebroken then. I hated the feeling of being lonely. But establishing some new friendships and relationships with fellow journalers felt like the rubber band ball grew a great deal.

So that's where my head is at right now. Thinking about the rubber band ball that's in my desk.Thinking about how wonderful it is to add to it. Giving it an even bigger bounce than before.

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